Hey Fatty!

I, like any red blooded internet-er, enjoy me some blogs. One I check on a (near) daily basis is the Fat Cyclist. The blog started out many moons ago as a way to hold himself accountable for his weight gain/loss. It is mostly cycling anecdotes, fictitious letters to cycling luminaries/companies, and a killer mashed potato recipe. A handful of years ago his wife was diagnosed with cancer so the blog became a release valve for the stresses associated with that in addition to the usual cycling stories. He also started raising money for the Lance Armstrong Foundation through it. Last year he hit almost $1,000,000. His wife passed away this last year and it was amazing to see the support he got.

Anyway, he is funny and emotional and the story is compelling and he's from Utah and blah, blah, blah. It's a blog I like.

Tash and I were on our way out of IKEA a few weeks ago and I saw a guy in a black jacket with the Fat Cyclist logo on the front.

It was the Fat Cyclist himself.

I looked around a second when someone said "Hey Fatty!" before I realized that I said it. I yelled "Hey Fatty!" at a complete stranger, across a parking lot. He turned around and smiled and I flubbed something about how I read his blog. We shook hands, he said thanks for reading, and we parted ways.

A couple of things about our meeting:
1)I'm a little embarrassed that I was so excited to meet a guy who lives in the the next county south, and who I could have met on a bike if I wasn't as lazy as I am instead of at IKEA.

2) Not only is he not fat (which I did know since I read his blog and he is vain and posts pictures of himself all the time), but he is short. I'm not exactly a man of great physical stature (I'm relatively short and I'm jiggly in the middle), but I am taller than he is by a couple of inches.

Or so says Tash. I was distracted by the majesty of his internet celebrity to notice.

This now takes over the top spot in my famous person sightings (I've only had two, I saw Connie Chung and the Salt Lake Airport and Perry Ferrel on the beach in California).

Yep, it really happened.

I've been waiting to post about this till I was sure it wasn't a dream. It has now been a few weeks and the object of dream worry is still sitting in my house so I'm pretty confident I'm awake and that it isn't a joke.

As I'm wont to do, I'll tell the long version.

Mid-November, Logan and I were g-chatting and before we got to the usual topic (bikes) he asked if I knew why Tash had called him the night before. I did not know the reason, nor was I aware that she called at all. Then he sent me a link to a full Wasatch Touring kit on KSL classifieds and asked if I liked it. "Si" I said. It was cool. That night, Tash asked what size cycling jersey I wear.

Now, I'm not the sharpest tool in the Clifford family shed, but when my brother and wife are making calls to each other, then they both ask me about cycling clothing within the span of a few days, well, I knew something had to be up.

The next time Logan and I spoke (which was about bikes) I persuaded him to admit that Tash was going to get me the Wasatch Touring kit. And he did. I was excited. And did my best to play like I didn't know what was going on.

So you can imagine my surprise when Christmas Day came and the box with my name on it contained this


(The picture isn't 100% accurate. Mine has an upgraded saddle and crankset, and the tires Vittorias.)

A brand new, full carbon (made by the fine folks who manufacture carbon frames for Felt and Giant, among others), Ultegra/105 equipped Motobecane road bike.

Now, some of you may be thinking, "ok, a bike." But here is the thing, we have a dozen bikes at our house, guess how many of those bikes I bought new. One. I saved up my paper route money and in 9th grade (yes, I still had a paper route in 9th grade) bought a Bianchi mountain bike. At nearly a grand it was the biggest purchase I had ever made. My road bike - the one I rode in LOTAJA, and up our canyons countless times, and all over - I bought off my boss at Gart Brothers. It was a late 80s/early 90s 7-speed steel bike with downtube shifters. It weighs more than the aforementioned mountain bike, which is a serious faux pas in the cycling world. Going all the way through my bicycle linage, this is only my second new bike. Ever. A pretty thoughtful gift to say the least.

My first real ride was a quick 28 mile ride down south. I got some hills, some flats, some corners (both climbing and on the flats). I was surprised with how smooth and responsive the ride of carbon was. Having an extra three gears in the back didn't hurt either. I only had my camera phone, but you get the idea







I won't go as far as to say it is a fast bike, a bike is only as fast as the person riding it. But while I am not fast at all right now, it was a great ride. I have some big riding plans this year (well, one plan really, and that is to ride - a lot. Maybe even till my legs fall off.). With this new, beautiful machine I'm sure motivation will not be a limiting factor.

Now if only we could do something about the snow.

50%

I am two days into my "commute 15 times in 30 work days" self challenge. So far I'm right on schedule. I didn't ride yesterday, but I did today. Again, my math is not so good, but it seems like 15 is half of 30, and 1 is half of 2, so that is on schedule, right?

Well, it killed me. I'm not sure what has happened in the last couple of months, but I don't think 11 silly miles has been that hard for me in a long, long time. I am ashamed to say it, but I had to make use of the smaller of my two rings up front. It took me 20 minutes longer than it used to. What a sad sack I am.

As Tasha said, though, "[I'll] only get faster."

I imagine that is true. I like to think I have enough base miles in my legs that I will be back on track pretty soon. To ensure that happens, I have made some goals for myself.

Ride I Think I Canyons.
Not just plug along through it, actually ride it in a decent time. I don't know what a decent time is yet, I'll figure that out.

Get a top 10 finish in one of the local crit series races.
One top 10 might not seem like a serious goal, and it might not be. I raced a fair amount in high school, and I did ok a some of the races. But that was in high school and on a mountain bike, I haven't ever raced a road bike. I am also 25. I think most of the other 25 year olds who race the series think they are a few equipment upgrades away from going pro. I'll test the waters and adjust accordingly.

We will see how it goes.

I'm kind of a joke

Last night I set my alarm for 6:30 this morning. I figure that gives me enough time to get ready, eat a bagel and ride my bike into work. So this morning the alarm goes off, I get up, look out the window to see no rain or snow, and a forecast of upper 40s to low 50s. The perfect day to start riding again after a much, much too long hiatus, right? The answer is yes, it was the perfect day. So what did I do?

I climbed back in bed and slept for an hour.

Granted, Morgan stared crying, so I fell asleep feeding him. And our kitchen sink is clogged, so Bruce is coming down with a drain snake at 5, so in order to be home when he gets there I would have had to leave work on my bike around 4. But those are justifications in the weeniest, laziest sense of the word.

Driving to the freeway with the window down made feel like enough of a tool that I decided I needed a shot of will power, so I started my lent a couple days early. I haven't developed any major vices since lent last year, so I'm giving up soda again. So far, so good. Water and grape juice all day today (which is big considering the fridge full of soda 20 feet from my desk).

I am also working on how to give up being lazy. Lent starts Ash Wednesday (the 25th, this year) and goes till Easter (April 12th, this year). Subtracting weekends, a conference in southern Utah, and accounting for my poor math skills, I'm left with around 30 work days. I don't think a goal of riding to work no less than 15 of those 30 days is impractical. Of course, I'll shoot for more, but let's honest, lazy isn't an easy habit to kick.

18 year old me would be bummed that my goal is 330 miles in 46 days, because that is around 7 miles a day. But 18 year old me can bite 25 year old me.